Do we really need to read Goodnight Moon and If You Give a Mouse a Cookie again? It’s high time we make storytime work for us. Why tell the tired old tale of the little bird that lost its mother when you can use one of these story gems to coax your kid into much-needed action? These stories are most effective with a mojito in hand. You’re welcome!
*****
In an intergalactic space station, Striker Fierce raises his saber blade to eye level. He waves it back and forth rhythmically, its undulating drone mesmerizing the crowd that has gathered to witness the epic battle.
“No one can defeat the forces of darkness, Striker Fierce,” says Savage Hellthroat, the leather-clad dominator of the hidden world.
“I have the secret of Aurora and the courage of Borealis,” says Striker. “And I shall prevail. But first, I’ll need to put on my socks.”
Now you put on your socks.
*****
All the princesses were all together, having a birthday party with cake. It was all of their birthdays at the same time! And so every princess got her own cake — the one with the blue dress, and the one with the purple dress, and the one with the pink dress, who was the prettiest princess of all.
“But where are the talking animals?” said the marginally popular princess.
“The talking animals are sad today,” said the spirited princess who looked as if she had a naughty secret. “Because their bangs are too long. So they can’t come to the party. And that’s why all the birthday cakes are about to be destroyed!”
Let me cut your hair, and then the princesses won’t be devastated.